Reaching for a hug, your arms wrap around me, enveloping me once again
with thoughts of tender moments passed. I miss you, and I can tell you miss something
about me. Maybe its my presence, because lately when you are around,
your lungs cant seem to get enough air, trying to breath in every ounce of me.
Maybe it is my warmth, because your hugs get longer and stronger with every embrace.
Like it is the last time you will ever lean your chin on top of my mane, hold my waist, feel the tickle of my curls breeze across your arms, you memorize my body's connection to yours.
It could be the comfort you feel when you pull away and cup my cheek with your hands
that know me just as well as your eyes. Remembering how it was to lay around for hours just to be close, your eyes change and tell me how lonely you are. I start to pull my hand away from yours, but you refuse to let go, like it is going to take away the love I have for you. It is late,
so I say goodnight, and you walk away quickly, never turning back. I struggle to walk the other way, feeling as if we are magnets and our connection is to strong to separate. I get far enough, the pull releases, and we part into our own lives once again, only to hope for another embrace.
MKS
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
The Rob T-Shirt
Faded
into shades of brown and gold,
your ironed image
draws curious attention like an antique.
Your printed face surrounded by a white canvas
can still light up a room.
The charm behind your smile,
the spirit in your ember eyes,
cannot be expressed or erased.
Since you are unforgettable,
you are undefinable.
A young man who can never be replaced,
just embraced, even from just a glance
at an aging t-shirt.
People still want to know who you are,
and I can not give them a clear answer.
I just tell them you're my brother,
because if I even started to try
to describe who you are,
I could go for hours, but it still wouldn't be enough.
So I keep your memory alive in my heart
and let your picture do the talking.
Seven years since the last day I saw you, but it feels like seven decades!
Love you, Rob!
into shades of brown and gold,
your ironed image
draws curious attention like an antique.
Your printed face surrounded by a white canvas
can still light up a room.
The charm behind your smile,
the spirit in your ember eyes,
cannot be expressed or erased.
Since you are unforgettable,
you are undefinable.
A young man who can never be replaced,
just embraced, even from just a glance
at an aging t-shirt.
People still want to know who you are,
and I can not give them a clear answer.
I just tell them you're my brother,
because if I even started to try
to describe who you are,
I could go for hours, but it still wouldn't be enough.
So I keep your memory alive in my heart
and let your picture do the talking.
Seven years since the last day I saw you, but it feels like seven decades!
Love you, Rob!
Friday, September 4, 2009
Remember Me
I never felt so close before
until i was closed out.. door shut
and slammed right on my heart
the pain in vein
my relationship with God tells me to love like I've never been hurt before
and since he blesses me
allowing the muscle of life to repeatedly beat
i repeat the offense, allowing myself to forray uninhibited into relationships
Unenviable friendships of
unevenness
Sometimes misleading
I hope, someday I'll be repayed, always allowing my friends to convey
their deepest feelings
but where were you when I needed it
When my eyes bled
streams of unenviable tears repetitously fell down my cheek
A feelin so unique
To a man, whose had 20 yrs to grasp and understand the fact that
men don't cry
but on this day, I couldn't help it
the words from my mother were like venom
poisoning my soul, and the result
were an aray of tantalizing thoughts, and pain that for years i've tried to hold
she was worried, about my demeanor, wanted me to get meaner
said the world is cold
don't sacrifice yourself if you yourself can't suffice
don't allow yourself to be misused and abused
these christian principles you follow find shallowness in this world in which hearts are hallow.
and as i struggled...with my identity. my lifestyle.. my essence
wondering why I strive to do right when others don't care if how they treat me was wrong..
emotionally unstable
psyche strangled
no one was there
nobody cared
life just went on...
until i was closed out.. door shut
and slammed right on my heart
the pain in vein
my relationship with God tells me to love like I've never been hurt before
and since he blesses me
allowing the muscle of life to repeatedly beat
i repeat the offense, allowing myself to forray uninhibited into relationships
Unenviable friendships of
unevenness
Sometimes misleading
I hope, someday I'll be repayed, always allowing my friends to convey
their deepest feelings
but where were you when I needed it
When my eyes bled
streams of unenviable tears repetitously fell down my cheek
A feelin so unique
To a man, whose had 20 yrs to grasp and understand the fact that
men don't cry
but on this day, I couldn't help it
the words from my mother were like venom
poisoning my soul, and the result
were an aray of tantalizing thoughts, and pain that for years i've tried to hold
she was worried, about my demeanor, wanted me to get meaner
said the world is cold
don't sacrifice yourself if you yourself can't suffice
don't allow yourself to be misused and abused
these christian principles you follow find shallowness in this world in which hearts are hallow.
and as i struggled...with my identity. my lifestyle.. my essence
wondering why I strive to do right when others don't care if how they treat me was wrong..
emotionally unstable
psyche strangled
no one was there
nobody cared
life just went on...
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
a brother with a complex
have you ever met it
the obstacle that stands tall in front of you but is invisible
have you ever tried to ignore it, like a call from an unrecognizable number
then eventually realized that your only blocking your calling
people always say life is like a movie
somethin between disney and them rated r flicks
somethin between a luv story or a mind altering documentary
well if i told the story
from the directors cut
id make sure to send a message of power
conveying that the thing that has many constantly sustaining cuts and bruises
the thing that always stops the progression of a movements
a lifestyle of emptiness
no fuel to burn ur passionate fires
fluctuating faith and a life of unfulfilled desires
is fear
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
I wish that I could lie
say my heart didn't beat faster when you were around
That our hands never touched
That seeing you wasn't more than enough
To make my previously empty soul feel saturated
With happiness
Like my stomach wasn't in need of food.. u were more than eye candy.. ur auora nourished me. made me full
of words attached to children on the night before Christmas
your presence was God's gift to me
Him blessing me with Godly love meant a lot to me
I wish I never got excited when your name popped up on ur phone
Never bolted to another room
In need of privacy because I was involved with something so sacred
I wish we never hugged like we used to
Remember I used to press ur heart against my chest, holding onto your soft hair
whispering in your ear
if you felt the throbs of love my heart sent
Even as a writer it was you that made me believe that actions speak louder than words
Because when actions didn't miror words
I couldn't help but feel the opposite of that four letter words
say my heart didn't beat faster when you were around
That our hands never touched
That seeing you wasn't more than enough
To make my previously empty soul feel saturated
With happiness
Like my stomach wasn't in need of food.. u were more than eye candy.. ur auora nourished me. made me full
of words attached to children on the night before Christmas
your presence was God's gift to me
Him blessing me with Godly love meant a lot to me
I wish I never got excited when your name popped up on ur phone
Never bolted to another room
In need of privacy because I was involved with something so sacred
I wish we never hugged like we used to
Remember I used to press ur heart against my chest, holding onto your soft hair
whispering in your ear
if you felt the throbs of love my heart sent
Even as a writer it was you that made me believe that actions speak louder than words
Because when actions didn't miror words
I couldn't help but feel the opposite of that four letter words
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
O M G
sorry.. i've kind have been 'overposting' recently.. right now im in the lib.. tryin to bang out my first profile piece.. and i was just tryin to find somethin to listen to on youtube.. so obv.. i searched drake.. and i just clicked on this track... i mean.... the dude is just.. idk.. he just doesn't make bad music... he's just on some other stuff.. i literally was cheesin after the first verse.. i had to put down my headphones and walk around the library.. just to get my body warm cuz dude was just too cold... but everytime i sai i'm feelin someone everyone else gotta be like "y u on his jock." u can't even like another dude's music without bein dissed or called somethin that i'd have to PAUSE. lol.. aiight here's the track.. judge for urself..btw jazziye fizzle i see ur comments! i never kno how to respond cuz their so.... jazmin... i do wanna sai thnx for the luv... and im glad u can relate with the poems (this is my polite wai of saying STOP TRYNA TAKE CREDIT FOR MY WISE WORDS! j/k.) back to drizzy tho
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
in progress: what i've learned
i learned that drunken girls get exploited by overeager guys and in the aftermath try to hide that they were victimized
its always hard to look through a victims eyes, and harder for them to let pride subside
so they mask pain, find comfort within lies, espouse laughter find terror within cries
embedded in their psyche is that their feelins don't matter so their shortage of self appreciation is only a natural disaster
i learned that most college girls are tryna find themselves, but look for men to determine their self wealth
so their expedition turns into a search for mr wright
on that wrong plight
They determine that they cant be fine by themselves
i learned that most girls hearts are in relationships with dudes their mind knows they shouldn't have relations with
i learned that most dudes are kids satisfied with doing anything they can get away with,
their conscience needs growth, they have humility just need that tough luv to get them to display it
i learned that most dudes are smarter than woman ever give them credit for, females point out our immaturity to hide their insecurities, to convince themselves they havent settled for grown men they abhor
i learned that sometimes bein distant will render u as different
as haters conspire, fulfill their desire to make others seem inferior
Its merely to compensate for shallowness, they need something to fill their interior
and though its hard not to reproach, i adopted the approach to still show love, breakin the barrier
side bar
people say you hate the one's you love. i fear that most love those who they should hate. Their relationships are technically flawed, trying to establish a relation with hatred. disregarding the ugly truth, that they are looking for the beauty that relationships exemplify, in someone they abhor. but their eyes are blind, because thats how love is. so in an attempt to feel out, feel loved and feel comforted, they feel pain. desperately searchin for solid ground, but remain dwelling in a place uncertainty, slipping and losing their desire to get back up on their OWN two feet.... must be black ice, or a silver lining that they choose to consistently ignore.
its always hard to look through a victims eyes, and harder for them to let pride subside
so they mask pain, find comfort within lies, espouse laughter find terror within cries
embedded in their psyche is that their feelins don't matter so their shortage of self appreciation is only a natural disaster
i learned that most college girls are tryna find themselves, but look for men to determine their self wealth
so their expedition turns into a search for mr wright
on that wrong plight
They determine that they cant be fine by themselves
i learned that most girls hearts are in relationships with dudes their mind knows they shouldn't have relations with
i learned that most dudes are kids satisfied with doing anything they can get away with,
their conscience needs growth, they have humility just need that tough luv to get them to display it
i learned that most dudes are smarter than woman ever give them credit for, females point out our immaturity to hide their insecurities, to convince themselves they havent settled for grown men they abhor
i learned that sometimes bein distant will render u as different
as haters conspire, fulfill their desire to make others seem inferior
Its merely to compensate for shallowness, they need something to fill their interior
and though its hard not to reproach, i adopted the approach to still show love, breakin the barrier
side bar
people say you hate the one's you love. i fear that most love those who they should hate. Their relationships are technically flawed, trying to establish a relation with hatred. disregarding the ugly truth, that they are looking for the beauty that relationships exemplify, in someone they abhor. but their eyes are blind, because thats how love is. so in an attempt to feel out, feel loved and feel comforted, they feel pain. desperately searchin for solid ground, but remain dwelling in a place uncertainty, slipping and losing their desire to get back up on their OWN two feet.... must be black ice, or a silver lining that they choose to consistently ignore.
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