Too Late

You would think he would've learned
after all the cliches and displays
of love lost and then missed.

I hate it
That he didn't realize he loved me
when he said he loved me;
every time before we hung up the phone,
every time we made up and changed our tone.
Its been three months since we broke up
and now hes looking to make up
because he is realizing what he lost
and how much time he's cost
us. You and me, we.

You would think I would have learned
after all the cliches and displays
of love lost and then missed.

I hate it
that it takes fear for me to realize
how much I love him again.
It dwells in the attic of my heart;
still there collecting dust,
lasting through the rain and the rust.
Then when hes sick or in pain
I get shocked and start to regain
my father-daughter connection to him.
I miss him more when we are together
then when I am away,
hoping this feeling is here to stay.

You would think we would've learned
after all the cliches and displays
of love lost and then missed.

I hate it
that it takes disaster for the world to realize
God is our only hope.
In the mean time, we cling to religion
until tragedy hits and turns routine into fiction.
No more beads to pray with,
no scientists to turn miracle into myth.
Just hope for that everlasting love
never truly found on earth, so eyes turn to Thee above.

MKS

Change gon Come

Maybe it's me
for years, i've adopted an ideology and blamed it on my biology
men stand alone
but maybe its just me
i think the world is against me, but im finding out that im against it
a time ticking bomb, time and life moves on, and i resent it
know that time is money but don't know how to spend it.
blamed love for the lack there of, yet ignore it's presence from the Lord above
Stood stagnant, wouldn't budge
through a tug a war, my soul wanted to find its better half, tryin to pull my heart
ego forcefully pullin it back, relationships fallin a part
so i turn emo, feed off hate, highlight battle scars
rich in pain,blamin the lord for dealin me black cards
Life's hard, but harder when u need to be consistent
but life consists goals whose plans are non existent
i apologize, for lookin at the world with bitter eyes
lookin at my blessings and still think that im terrorized
its a mind state, i wish were simple to overcome
think the start is to always remember that im his Son.
word

Temporary Grasp

Reaching for a hug, your arms wrap around me, enveloping me once again
with thoughts of tender moments passed. I miss you, and I can tell you miss something
about me. Maybe its my presence, because lately when you are around,
your lungs cant seem to get enough air, trying to breath in every ounce of me.
Maybe it is my warmth, because your hugs get longer and stronger with every embrace.
Like it is the last time you will ever lean your chin on top of my mane, hold my waist, feel the tickle of my curls breeze across your arms, you memorize my body's connection to yours.
It could be the comfort you feel when you pull away and cup my cheek with your hands
that know me just as well as your eyes. Remembering how it was to lay around for hours just to be close, your eyes change and tell me how lonely you are. I start to pull my hand away from yours, but you refuse to let go, like it is going to take away the love I have for you. It is late,
so I say goodnight, and you walk away quickly, never turning back. I struggle to walk the other way, feeling as if we are magnets and our connection is to strong to separate. I get far enough, the pull releases, and we part into our own lives once again, only to hope for another embrace.

MKS

The Rob T-Shirt

Faded
into shades of brown and gold,
your ironed image
draws curious attention like an antique.
Your printed face surrounded by a white canvas
can still light up a room.
The charm behind your smile,
the spirit in your ember eyes,
cannot be expressed or erased.
Since you are unforgettable,
you are undefinable.
A young man who can never be replaced,
just embraced, even from just a glance
at an aging t-shirt.
People still want to know who you are,
and I can not give them a clear answer.
I just tell them you're my brother,
because if I even started to try
to describe who you are,
I could go for hours, but it still wouldn't be enough.
So I keep your memory alive in my heart
and let your picture do the talking.



Seven years since the last day I saw you, but it feels like seven decades!
Love you, Rob!

Remember Me

I never felt so close before
until i was closed out.. door shut
and slammed right on my heart
the pain in vein
my relationship with God tells me to love like I've never been hurt before
and since he blesses me
allowing the muscle of life to repeatedly beat
i repeat the offense, allowing myself to forray uninhibited into relationships
Unenviable friendships of
unevenness
Sometimes misleading
I hope, someday I'll be repayed, always allowing my friends to convey
their deepest feelings
but where were you when I needed it
When my eyes bled
streams of unenviable tears repetitously fell down my cheek
A feelin so unique
To a man, whose had 20 yrs to grasp and understand the fact that
men don't cry
but on this day, I couldn't help it
the words from my mother were like venom
poisoning my soul, and the result
were an aray of tantalizing thoughts, and pain that for years i've tried to hold
she was worried, about my demeanor, wanted me to get meaner
said the world is cold
don't sacrifice yourself if you yourself can't suffice
don't allow yourself to be misused and abused
these christian principles you follow find shallowness in this world in which hearts are hallow.
and as i struggled...with my identity. my lifestyle.. my essence
wondering why I strive to do right when others don't care if how they treat me was wrong..
emotionally unstable
psyche strangled
no one was there
nobody cared
life just went on...

a brother with a complex

have you ever met it

the obstacle that stands tall in front of you but is invisible

have you ever tried to ignore it, like a call from an unrecognizable number

then eventually realized that your only blocking your calling

people always say life is like a movie

somethin between disney and them rated r flicks

somethin between a luv story or a mind altering documentary

well if i told the story

from the directors cut

id make sure to send a message of power

conveying that the thing that has many constantly sustaining cuts and bruises

the thing that always stops the progression of a movements

a lifestyle of emptiness

no fuel to burn ur passionate fires

fluctuating faith and a life of unfulfilled desires

is fear

I wish that I could lie
say my heart didn't beat faster when you were around
That our hands never touched
That seeing you wasn't more than enough
To make my previously empty soul feel saturated
With happiness
Like my stomach wasn't in need of food.. u were more than eye candy.. ur auora nourished me. made me full
of words attached to children on the night before Christmas
your presence was God's gift to me
Him blessing me with Godly love meant a lot to me
I wish I never got excited when your name popped up on ur phone
Never bolted to another room
In need of privacy because I was involved with something so sacred
I wish we never hugged like we used to
Remember I used to press ur heart against my chest, holding onto your soft hair
whispering in your ear
if you felt the throbs of love my heart sent
Even as a writer it was you that made me believe that actions speak louder than words
Because when actions didn't miror words
I couldn't help but feel the opposite of that four letter words